Afterwards
by Ashley Honeycutt
Summary: Canon compliant story immediately following Battle of Hogwarts. Rated T for later chapters.
1. Chapter 1

As Harry walked to Gryffindor Tower, he thought of Ginny. What would he say to her? Would she be upset with him? Of course she would, that seemed obvious enough. Could she forgive him? Would she want to forgive him? Would she, like him, hold him accountable for the many deaths? Would she blame him for the loss of her brother? These questions raced through Harrys mind, a torturous merry go round of pity and fear.

He found the entrance to the Gryffindor common room ajar, granting access to anyone. He expected to find people there, people celebrating or people mourning. People like him who wanted a rest. Happily though, he was alone. A million decisions plagued him every day. Horocrux or hallows? Gordric's Hallow or Hogwarts? To surrender or not? For the first time in ten months though, the most pressing decisions were not life or death. For now, his most pressing concerns had to do with hunger, sleep, or a shower. For now, his only goal was to feel clean and fed and rested. Happiness was a long way away, and the thought of little Teddy Lupin exemplified that.

"Kreacher," Harry said to no one. The elf appeared with a deafening crack, and Harry breathed a sigh of relief. For all Kreacher's faults, Harry was glad to see him unhurt.

"Master Harry," Kreacher bowed low, the locket around his neck, almost touching the floor.

"Master Regulus would be exceptionally pleased with how you defended Hogwarts, Kreacher. He would be proud of you, as am I." The house elf's eyes filled with water threatening to spill over, but he beamed at Harry. "I wondered, Kreacher, if you would be willing to fetch me a change of clothes and something to eat?" Again, Kreacher remained wordless. He nodded, the tears in his eyes brimming, his smile still wide. "Thank you, Kreacher. You've done more than you'll ever know to fulfill Regulus's dying wish." Kreachers low bow dropped fat tears onto the floor where the locket dangled. Before Harry could attempt to comfort the creature, he disapperated with another crack.

Harry walked to the bathroom and caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror. He was used to being thin. He was starved on more than one occasion at the Dursley's, but this was different. His untidy hair had grown out some, and it magnified the newfound thinness of his cheeks. He was covered in burns from the Lestrange's vault. His clothes singed from spells and his face bloodied from cascading debris. Dirt from the Forbidden Forest lay atop the injuries and grime, camouflaging the mess.

The hot water from his shower made his burns sear, but it washed away the dirt and sweat with surprising ease. Rust colored water ran down the drain as dried blood and mud came off in clumps. Rust colored turned to red, as fresh blood was washed off injuries being reopened. Harry heard Kreachers crack into the room, the jostling of dishes, and another crack as he left. It sounded like Kreacher was talking to himself, but Harry couldn't make out what the strange elf was saying. Satisfied that he was as close to clean as he was going to get, he shut off the water and wrapped a towel around himself. As his glasses fogged making it impossible to see, he made his way back to the dorm room he once shared with his friends. How many lifetimes ago was that?

As his four posted bed came into view, Harry was certain his eyes were playing tricks on him. It might have been the light from the window that prevented him from seeing Ginny sitting on the edge of his bed. Shaking his head like a dog after a bath, he stared. It wasn't a trick though, she was there. Harry stood there, staring. He had hoped he'd have time to decide what to say to her. He wanted time to decide how to explain the past ten months. Time to decide how to tell her the worst parts. Time to work up an apology. She stared back for some amount of time Harry couldn't pinpoint even with his watch on. They sat surrounded in silence that was neither comfortable nor uncomfortable. Limbo. Heat crept up the back of Harry's neck as he realized how under dressed he was, but Ginny seemed unaware of his literal and figurative vulnerability.  
_

"Gin-," Harry croaked, his voice betraying him. He tried again. "Ginny. I- Please- I need to get dressed. But please… I mean- Just, just wait here. Please? Just- Just don't leave. I'll- I'll be right back just don't- Don't go," Harry stammered and stuttered and was unsure about everything. A beat passed with no reaction. Had she not heard him? Would he have to try and spit out another sentence? He was unsure that was even possible. Thankfully, she nodded with the faintest glimmer of a smile at his nervousness.

Harry grabbed his clothes and wand from a nearby table where Kreacher had left them, and retreated to the bathroom. Staring himself once again in the mirror, he tried to calm his nerves. She hadn't hexed him, she hadn't yelled. Perhaps she wasn't mad. Perhaps she understood. Perhaps she would forgive him. It seemed too good to be true though. Could forgiveness for leaving her and for not saying good-bye would be offered so readily? Harry hurried to pull on his jeans and tee shirt paying little attention to how he looked. It could not have mattered less how he looked. All that mattered was going back to Ginny, to make sure she hadn't changed her mind and left. For ten months his priorities had been about defeated Riddle. If he stood any chance of getting Ginny back, she had to be the priority now. The thought terrified Harry. Could he make her as happy as she deserved? Should he step aside to allow her to find someone new? Someone who could never be held accountable for the deaths of more than 50 people? Someone who could never be seen as responsible for Fred's death? His name stuck in Harry's mind. Fred.

Doing everything in his power to push the thought of Fred from his mind, he went back to his room. In some way, he was almost surprised to see Ginny waiting, just like he had asked of her. She was covered in similar grime that Harry had been. Her hair was knotted in the back, her eyes were full of an emotion Harry struggled to identify. It was such a range of emotions Harry couldn't identify them all. Contentedness, for the battle finally being over. Grief, for the loss of her brother and her friends. Exhaustion. Anger. Relief. Fear. She was still so exquisite. In every way she showed strength, grace, fearlessness.

Getting his thoughts organized was a near impossible task. One step at a time, Harry thought. Just go sit near her. His feet obeyed his thoughts and he shuffled closer to her. He cursed himself for having said nothing so far. He sat on his bed at what he hoped was a respectful difference. Close enough to hold her hand if she'd let him, far away enough that he didn't presume their reunion. Harry was painfully aware of every move he made, silently praying he wouldn't do something wrong.

It was so natural. So expected in a way. Ginny looked up at Harry, and in an instant they were wrapped in each other arms. Harry leaned back against the headboard and held Ginny while his shirt dampened with her tears. Unsure what to say or what to do, Harry stroked her hair and rested his cheek on the top of her head. For ten months Harry thought about the moment that he would get to hold her again. He thought about how desperate and starved for each other it might be. Maybe it would be a happy, long embrace full of celebration at their reunion. In every scenario, they were happy to be together again. In every scenario, the only death would be Riddles. They sat like that for what felt like hours before one of them spoke.

"You can't do that again. You can't pretend to be dead. You can't surrender yourself and not say good bye to me. You can't leave me with the reasoning that it's for my own good, because I can promise you, I would have been better off with you this year." Ginny's tears remained the same, but her voice was steadfast. "You can't do that to me again. You can't," her voice wavered this time though.

"Ginny-," Harry started.

"No. No there's no 'Ginny', right now. There's no excuse, no reason, no explanation," She sat up and looked Harry in the eyes. Her tears had washed away some of the blood on her face, creating streaks of clear, pale skin. Harry obliged and remained quiet, but Ginny couldn't seem to meet his eyes when she spoke again. Instead, she look at the burns on Harrys hands, which now rested in his lap. "I think that you love me. I know you broke up with me because you didn't want me to get hurt but I think it's more than that. I think you love me. And if you do, this has to be it. You can't keep pushing me aside so you can take care of everything by yourself. If you love me, then you have to love that I'm just as capable. I'm not some damsel in distress, you don't get to save me. You get to respect me, and you get to treat me as an equal." Without waiting for an answer, she laid back down on Harry's chest, her tears finally subsiding. He conjured a small basin of warm water and a small wash cloth. With the damp cloth he began washing away the dried tears, the dirt, the blood from her cheeks. With one arm around her waist, he rinsed the cloth and began again. He never mistook the freckles that were sprinkled over her face as anything but stars in the night sky. They created constellations on her nose and cheeks that Harry could identify even blind.

"I do," Harry began. The words caught in his throat when Ginny looked up with her chocolate brown eyes. He tried again. "I do love you. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. There's nothing more than I wanted than to have you there with me. I wanted you to be safe. I thought… I thought you would be safe here. I thought they wouldn't hurt you because you're pure blood. I thought they wouldn't know about us. I'm so sorry." Harry broke eye contact first, unable to stomach the understanding, forgiveness, and love he saw in Ginny. He set aside the wash cloth and wrapped both arms around her, unable to face her as he spoke again. "I'll tell you everything. Not this second, but I'll make sure you know everything that happened. You're right, you're more than capable. I can't bear the thought of something happening to you. I've lost everyone else. I can't lose you too. But you're right. I love you and if you'll have me back I won't insist I know what would keep you safer. I'll do better. I promise." The nervousness Harry had felt initially had subsided at some point, only to come back as full-fledged fear. He clung to her tighter, afraid she would turn him away and that this would be the last time he could hold her.

"I love you too," Ginny shimmed up closer to Harry, resting her head on his shoulder. He exhaled a breath he didn't know he was holding, but refusing to loosen his arms. Not doing everything to keep Ginny safe scared him, but losing her scared him more.


	2. Chapter 2

A/N

I'm so obscenely grateful for the views, follows, and favorites. You have no idea how excited I am about each and every message I get saying someone has read this. Thank you. Also, if you didn't see my last A/N, I'm new here and struggling to figure this platform out but I think I'm getting the hang of it. I know this is going pretty slowly so far but it was important to me to take my time with this section, but we'll be picking up the pace in the next section. Drop a line if you're reading- I'd love to hear from you.

Harry wasn't sure how or when it happened, but somehow they had fallen asleep. He glanced out the window and saw it was starting to get dark, but that didn't help him identify the time or day. Fabian Prewett's watch said it was 6pm. He thought it was likely dinner was being served in the Great Hall and his stomach cramped at the thought. There was food Kreacher had brought for him, but it had been long forgotten in the reunion. Ginny shifted in her sleep, causing Harry to hold his breath. The last thing he wanted was for Ginny to wake up. As tired as he was, he knew she needed to rest. She looked older, somehow. Wiser, even. The war had been unkind to the world, but it seemed especially difficult on Ginny. She should have been in her sixth year, studying for NEWTs, playing Quidditch, and seeing her friends. Instead she regularly risked her wellbeing restarting the DA and protecting younger students. Her eyelids fluttered as her hair fell in front of her face. When Harry pushed back the hair she opened her eyes and stared up at him.

"Are you hungry?" Harry asked her.

"Famished," she said laughing. It was good to see her laugh, to see her happy. A shadow seemed to fall over her face though, and the smile was gone as quickly as it came. She had woken up and forgotten about Fred's death, Harry was almost certain. He had been through it himself more times than he could count. How many mornings had he woken up happy and content before remembering Sirius was gone?

"Let's go downstairs and see if we can get some dinner." Harry kissed her forehead and helped her up, never letting go of her hand.

As they crossed the room, Harry was struck by how much everything had changed. He had never lived in a world without the threat of Riddle hanging over his head. In this world, he had a future. He could have a career, even a family. Death surrounded him from infancy, and it wasn't over yet. The losses of Remus, Tonks, Fred, Colin, and everyone else would haunt him. It was comforting to know they hadn't died in vain, but it stung nonetheless.

Ginny led them down the staircase and to the common room where they were greeted by a room full of red hair. She dropped Harry's hand quickly and stiffened at the sight of her entire family. Did they notice they had come from the same stairwell? If so, did they care? Mrs. Weasley bustled over to them, her eyes red from crying. She seemed tired and lost in grief, but she managed a smile.

"You're too thin, as usual," she said kindly, patting his cheek. "Come eat, both of you. You must be starving." She wrapped Harry in a tight hug, while Ginny slipped away quietly. "We love you, so very much. I hope you know you're a part of our family," she whispered. "Sit, sit! I'll make you a plate! We thought you would want to avoid the Great Hall. Most people have stayed here while Kingsley figures out what to do with the… The people we lost." She struggled with the words, but busied herself at a table of food, making plates for everyone.

Harry nodded in response, unable to speak. Mrs. Weasley released Harry from the embrace and they approached the rest of the family. Upon inspection Harry noticed Hermione sitting between Ron and Charlie on the couch nearest the fire. Bill and Fleur sat together on an armchair, while George sat between his parents before Mrs. Weasley got up. Harry sat on the last sofa with Percy, Ginny between them. As Mrs. Weasley started making plates of food for everyone, Harry looked at his friends. Hermione and Fleur wore similar expressions. Tired and grief stricken, but doing their best to remain respectful of the overwhelming sadness in the room. Ron, Bill, and Charlie looked pained, but it was nothing compared to Percy. Percy's recent reunification with his family was overshadowed by guilt. The last person to speak to Fred, to joke with him, was Percy. Harry forced himself to look over at George. They had all lost a brother, but George had lost a twin. A best friend, a business partner. The pain in his eyes was unimaginable and unbearable. Soon, a plate was thrusted into his lap and he ate in silence along with the rest of the family.

It was awhile before anyone broke the silence, but it was Charlie that finally spoke up.

"So, Harry, where were you and Ginny?" He smirked seeing Harry fidget.

"Oh bugger off Charlie like I don't know about you and-" Ginny started.

"I think that's so great! Hey let's play wizards chess and not talk anymore, eh, Gin?" Charlie said loudly over the rest of Ginny's sentence. She smirked and the mood seemed a little lighter.

"Hermione, do you know when you'll go to find your parents?" Harry asked. She looked down and shifted in her seat.

"Well, actually, I was thinking about leaving tomorrow morning. I don't really know where I'm going so I'm flying there. Apperation would be tricky. With any luck though they'll have continued their dental practice and I'll be able to find them quickly. So I should be home in a couple days. I should be back in time for the memorial, at the latest." She seemed to feel guilty in a way, as though she was abandoning Harry and the Weasley's by finding her parents again.

"Flying? You hate broomsticks! Why didn't you tell me? I'll go with you, you shouldn't be alone," Ron said.

"No, not broomsticks. I'll be flying on a plane," she responded. Her statement was met by shocked stares from the Weasley family.

"An aeroplane, you mean? Really? Isn't that quite dangerous?" Mr. Weasley asked.

"Ronald Weasley you will NOT get on a tin can that flies!" Mrs. Weasley demanded.

"Mum I'm of age you can't-" Ron started.

"I don't know why you have to leave Ron you just got back," Percy said.

"Percy YOU just got back-," Ron started again.

"ENOUGH," Mrs. Weasley shouted. The room quieted. "Ronald, if you're going to Australia with Hermione, you're traveling separately and to return before the memorial. No excuses. Hermione, dear, that does not sound safe, and I encourage you to find another mode of transportation. One that doesn't involve death, preferably. I realize I'm not your mother but if she was here I'm certain she would say the same thing."

"Mrs. Weasley, airplanes are very safe. They'll be fine," Harry said, before addressing Hermione. "Do you want me to go with you guys? It feels weird, the thought of being separated after so long." Harry had always thought of Hermione as a sister, but the familial friendship had become paramount.

"No, no. You should stay here," Hermione's eyes flickered over to Ginny, who was staring at her hands. Harry reached for her hand, hoping she would understand why he was willing to leave. Again.

"So, now that this is over. Are you going to tell us what you three were doing?" Bill was the first to ask the question Harry knew would come a hundred times in the next few days. It seemed daunting to have to explain everything, but in a way he felt like he owed it to the Weasley's. Kingsley, and some people from the Order would need the full details, but after that they would be done. Harry looked to Ron and Hermione who seemed to be thinking the same thing.

Harry started by detailing the private lessons he had with Dumbledore the year before. Hermione detailed their departure from the wedding. Ron detailed their Ministry break in. They took turns with the story, interjecting where one seemed to forget. Ginny tightened her grasp on Harry's hand occasionally. The family asked questions, but for the most part remained entrenched in the story. Only George remained completely silent, but he did react. Ron confessed to his leaving which poorly received, especially by Charlie, George, and Ginny. Before anyone could say anything though, Harry took over and skipped to the part where Ron saved his life. It didn't seem to save Ron from Ginny's fury, but it did placate the three Weasley's temporarily at least. Hermione backtracked to describe the trip to Godric's Hollow. They continued on, describing the hollows, the horocuxes, and the Gringotts break in. Bill laughed at that point, reminding them that they would likely never be allowed back.

When they reached the end it was after 10pm, and everyone was tired. Mr. and Mrs. Weasley, and Bill and Fleur left the common room and headed for the guest suites after saying good night. No one seemed to know quite what to say to each other and favored quite departures over anything. Hermione and Ron headed up towards the dorms, exhausted from detailing their adventure. Ginny and Charlie played wizards chess while Percy and Harry watched. It was quiet for the most part, a comfortable silence. George sat by, staring into the fire. He rose unexpectedly and embraced Ginny, telling her that she loved him. Considering this was the first time Harry had heard him speak, it seemed like a good sign. He went upstairs, presumably to bed. After another sound defeat by Ginny, Charlie joined his brothers upstairs. Percy followed close by, leaving Ginny and Harry alone once again.


	3. Chapter 3

A/N- Alright y'all. I had started writing this chapter and then my computer decided to crap out on me. After 6 years of trusty service ol' reliable is hanging on by it's last thread. I'm debating buying a new one right now but it's so expensive, ugh! Anyways, there wasn't much else I planned to add to this chapter anyways so I wanted to share it just in case it got lost! As always, I'd love to talk! I hope you're all having a great day!

"You meant to die." It was a statement, not a question. She knew the answer. "You meant to die and you didn't say goodbye to me." It wasn't accusatory. She didn't demand an explanation, or an apology. She deserved a hundred explanations and apologies, but she waited.

"I couldn't Gin. I couldn't bring myself to say goodbye because I never could have walked away from you like that." It felt like a weak apology. Even as Harry said it he knew it wasn't enough. How do you tell someone you love that in this one instance you couldn't walk away from them, when that's all you've done in the past? "I don't want to go to Australia but I needed to at least be willing to go. Hermione's stuck by me for ten months and if she asked for two days from me I couldn't tell her no."

Ginny nodded and in some way Harry believed she truly understood. She knew what it meant to have siblings and she knew Harry and Hermione were as close to siblings as you could get. "Let's go for a walk. It's late enough most people are probably asleep, and you must be getting cabin fever avoiding your adoring fans." Her eyes sparkled at the light teasing. Harry wanted to deny that he was hiding, but if he was being honest that's exactly what he was doing. He had never liked the limelight, and this was no exception.

Together they left through the portrait hole, Harry's arm wrapped around Ginny's waist. As they walked throughout the castle they cleaned small messes. Short, fat mounds of rubble stood to create upright walls again. Paintings singed and torn came back to life as they repaired. Blood slid off walls and disappeared. It seemed like such miniscule tasks, things that didn't make the difference Harry has wanted to make. This evening wasn't about cleaning the castle though, not really. It was about having a moment of complete solitude with the person whose company he had craved most for ten months.

"What happened here, while you were still at school Ginny? I know about the DA, and about you trying to steal the sword, but other than that…" Harry trailed off, hoping Ginny would elaborate. They finally made it towards the entrance hall and walked outside. The midnight air was cold on their injuries, but refreshing in a way. They walked towards their favorite spot near the lake before sitting down.

"School was… Hard. The Carrow's were in charge of punishments which was a lot of torture. They came down on the half-bloods pretty hard especially. Most of us who were pureblood tried to take the brunt of the punishments. At the end of the day though they wouldn't kill us. It would have been wasteful to kill a pureblood." In a way, Harry had counted of Ginny's blood status protecting her. Consciously he never would have noticed it, but somewhere in the back of his mind he believed she was safer. He had never imagined her taking punishments to protect other students. "We tried to steal the sword, I knew Dumbledore had left it to you and I thought we could manage to get it to you somehow. It seems stupid looking back but we wanted to help. To do something besides sitting there waiting for the next detention. That's when we decided to start the DA again, which helped. It gave a lot of us a rallying point. Until kids started going missing and family members were being threatened. By the time Christmas came a lot of people were going into hiding, or were missing. At that point it was survival. Once the Ministry realized Ron was with you and you guys had gotten to Bills, Bill came to the Burrow and moved us all to Auntie Muriel's. I begged him to take me back to Shell Cottage with him but no one would let me. And you know the rest."

"I thought you'd be safer here. If I had known that things would be so bad here I… Well I don't know what I would have done. Something different, but short of dragging you all over creation with me and never using magic because you're underage, I'm not sure what," Harry said. "We should go inside and get some rest. Do you know what's happening tomorrow?" By this point they were laying down in the dewy grass. The sky was its darkest point, soon it would start to lighten again.

"I think we're waiting for everyone to wake up and then going back to the Burrow. Dad went back there this morning to see what state it's in. It's been searched, so there's some cleaning, but for the most part it's livable. At minimum, it's standing. Mum said you'd want to get out of here with as few people knowing as possible. Kingsley knows, of course, but that should be the extent of it," she told him. Harry nodded his approval. Mrs. Weasley was right, Harry wanted to attract as little notice as possible. He didn't want to detract attention away from those that died in this war, but even more than that he didn't want the Weasley's interogated by reporters and well-wishers. Everyone had been so kind, but Harry wasn't interested in their thanks. As far as he was concerned, he'd only done what was exactly needed. It was chance, happenstance that put him in a position to kill Riddle. It could have been Neville in another life.

Harry stood up, helping Ginny to her feet at the same time. They walked back to the castle, hand in hand. There was something so wonderful about the silence around them. There was no need to fill the air with noise, no need to chatter about anything. How wonderful it was to be with someone that you could enjoy a peaceful stillness with. When they reached the common room Harry leaned over and kissed the top of Ginny's head.

"You should head upstairs, get some rest. I think I'm going to hang out down here for a little while," he said.

"If it's okay with you I'd rather stay, I don't particularly fancy being alone right now. And I can't go up to the boys dormitories because my brothers are up there. Much as they like you, I doubt they'd like waking up to find me in your bed."

Harry chuckled before remembering how burly Charlie is, and death seemed almost as close as it had been in the Forbidden Forest.


	4. Chapter 4

Alright y'all- This is a super short chapter, I'm working on chapter 5 that should be up and published this week. After this chapter we'll be skipping ahead about two months to find life returning to something near normal! Thanks again everyone, you mean the world to me.

One by one each member of the Weasley family made it downstairs. The long nights rest seem to benefit everyone, and for a moment Harry was reminded of the quiet summers at the Burrow. Harry greeted each member of the family as they filed in, careful not to wake Ginny. She had fallen asleep late last night on the couch in the common room, unwilling to leave Harry but exhausted. Sleep did not come for Harry though. For the first time, he had a real future. Suddenly, he realized he would have to find a place to live. A job. He could no longer use his goal to defeat Riddle as his sole motivator, Dumbledore could no longer walk him through life. Even in these past days following the battle, he knew people had been kind enough to leave him be. Here, Harry was safe, warm, and fed. It was as liberating as it was terrifying. For six years Harry's only purpose was to survive, and now survival was no longer the only goal. Harry debated all his options. Would he go back to Grimmuald Place? Find a new place to live? Would he go back to school, if given the option? Would he have to go back to school to fulfill his long-harbored ambition to become an Auror? Every possible scenario ran through his mind, but none entirely satisfied him. The only certainty would be that he would go back to the Burrow, although he couldn't stay there forever.

Hermione was the last to join the group downstairs. Charlie had woken Ginny up by creating a loud, vaguely musical sound. Before she had a chance to retaliate, Hermione has interrupted.

"Well, we'll be going now," she stated it in a way to suggest she was unsure, as though she should ask permission. "Ron and I are apperating to Kings Cross station and from there going by car to the airport. We're taking a flight to Brisbane, finding my parents, reversing the memory charm, and then ideally we'll be back. It'll take about four days since the flight is so long."

Each of the Weasley's stood to offer the pair embraces and wishes for safe travels. This time though, wishing for safe travels felt less imperative. George was the last Weasley to say goodbye. Harry enfolded Hermione, hugging her tightly. They stood like that for several minutes, before finally releasing each other. It was difficult to watch his closest friends leave without him, but Harry was determined not to show his terror at being separated from them. He had never had siblings, Ron and Hemione were the closest he would ever have, and they were leaving. Temporary it may be, but the knowing feeling of uncertainty would likely remain Harry's constant companion for years to come.


End file.
